Therapy Needs To be Like A Mirror

I have mentioned before that significant relationships are like mirrors. Guess What? … therapy – ahem, let me amend that – good therapy is like that too (believe it or not). Good therapy will give you a ton of self-reflection. I know some of you are reading this saying, “Of course, Jen. Everybody knows that.” […]

Breaking Up and Really Moving On

Have you ever gone through a break-up? Maybe you were the one doing the leaving, maybe it was mutual, or maybe you were the one who was left. As tempting as it is to put “All By Myself” on repeat and devolve into a Bridget Jones-esque episode of low self esteem and general malaise, there […]

Finding the Right Person

Dating can be pretty confusing, and at times really stressful. Finding just the right person is probably one of the biggest pressures a single person (who wants to be partnered) is facing. Let’s be real, that is a tough decision to make. For example… You are dating this person. You think that this person is […]

How to Decode Your Values

Maybe you have read some previous entries on discovering your core values. Although self-discovery is really great, how to we put that knowledge into action? If you don’t know where to start, look at where you spend your time. If you say you like a clean house, how much time do you spend cleaning it? […]

Know Your Values

One concept that I always introduce in therapy is examining what you believe about the world and what you value. In order for you to change any aspect of your life, you have to look at the framework that keeps it in place. Although often unseen, you have rules that shape your decision making process. […]

Choose Your Own Adventure (Part 2)

Take off from my last entry, we left Junior in Aisle 9 putting on a show for anyone who would watch. His parents, understandably, were unimpressed. I presented three responses that a typical parent may take. Let’s examine them further. The parent who buys the cookies is often making that decision because they can’t think […]

Choose Your Own Adventure (Part 1)

The age-old question “Why does my child seem to want to throw tantrums in public?!” which leads to “How do I get them to stop?!” If you haven’t been there…well…you are either very lucky, or you don’t have kids. Our thinking goes like this – kid is being a tyrant in Aisle 9 because you […]

Well-Meaning Parents

I think that a majority of parents have the best of intentions with their children. They do not mean to harm them, or coddle them to excess. They really are well-meaning people. I’ll put myself in that “best of intentions parent” category because I’m one of them. I certainly mean well when I parent my […]

Mirrors

One of the most fascinating things about being in a significant relationship (partner, parent, family member) with someone is how you begin to see yourself in that relationship. I didn’t realize until after I was married that being in a significant relationship is a mirror. I really started to see who I was as a […]

Life Isn’t Fair

“Life Isn’t Fair” I used to say this a lot as a kid. Although my kids aren’t old enough yet to continue this trend, I am sure that the day will come when they do. I’ve already got my response planned – “Yep, life is not fair. Get used to it.” Understandably that sounds harsh, especially […]